confession of an emotera

hi there, have been busy with work for the past few days and i was'nt able to post any new article or new entry on this blog... it's just so happen this February is a crucial month for me as I need to pass my metrics or else my promotion will be interrupted (again!). It's a long story, but to give you a clue of what happened - I was informed by my coach previously that I will be promoted as a specialist as I was able to pass my metrics for 6 months but unfortunately - she informed me through text (the same day they will announce the names of the lucky employees) that since I had 2 absences before (due to high fever) - my promotion will be suspended. how sad. though she said i just need to pass my February metric and the suspension will be lifted (hopefully) it is still a very sad experience. I knew all along that I will be given that much awaited promotion but at the last minute...it's gone. It's like receiving an invitation informing you that you've won the best actress award but the presentor mentioned a different name on the awards night itself....hay, but I am still positive that this March - I will be there too. It's not that I am so excited about the recognition itself - it's one of the reasons but of course the biggest motivation for me is the increase in my salary. I want to put up a small business soon and been wanting to put up a small shop selling apparels and accessories so I need enough capital to start the business. That is the main reason why I need to be promoted now. So ayan, medyo nangarir muna ang lola nyo and pinagbutihan muna ang metrics ko...good thing it pays off.


Well...I've noticed that many of you are always visiting my site though it takes me about a week to post an article - honestly i was moved by that. So I think before anything else - I want to make things clear first. I must confess...at first, I made this blog for the purpose of making money. Yeah, for the past 3 months now, I've been doing some review articles for different pay per review services using my other blog i am emotera and i am doing just fine for that blog alone. But I thought to myself - the more blog I have, the more money I can make - so I immediately got this emotera.com domain.... I've been writing personal experiences and personal stuff as I think that's the easiest topic anyone can have in the blogging world... the only motivation for me to write and blog on this website is purely because of the potential amount of money I will earn. I feel that I need not be attached to this blog nor be sociable and make friends as I would soon loose my readers one by one once I already post my paid articles - it's my defense mechanism. I know myself and I know that once I am attached to something or to someone - I become more vulnerable. So to avoid that - I need to mean pure business and in that way, I wont get hurt if no more readers are visiting. I told myself as long as these sites pay me for my review articles - I should not care anymore.

But things have changed since I put up this website. I am now more concerned about writing sensibly and showing the "real me" - no hypocrisy whatsoever. What you see is what you get ... and I am happy that I have found my own niche in the blogging world. I never thought you could bring friendship and camaraderie among your fellow bloggers. The same persons who are in my blogroll constantly visits and leaves messagea from time to time to say hi and say they've been here. I really appreciate that and the feeling is overwhelming. For some, it's just a simple act of leaving a message hoping the administrator of the site will hit them back - but for some, I know it's a way of saying "keep updating" of "keep this blog alive as I am here reading this post". I know I am being emotional for such a simple thing, but what's the use of being emotera if i am not - right?! Anyways, I will be a liar if I will say I dont want to earn money from this - of course I do. But what I want to clear out is that - it's not my priority anymore. I am now more concerned about friendship, sharing my views and making my mark on the blogosphere. Being able to reach out to other's - keeping other blogs alive - and just simply sharing what I know to touch others lives is now on the top of my list. I hope and pray I could write sensible posts that would be beneficial to others as well.... Amen.


trivia: i drafted this post while eating lunch ALONE at Jollibee kaya medyo me emotional touch ang post na ito...